Desperate for Change

Meet my friend, Tiffany. (She’s so stinkin’ cute in that black visor!) We were playing tennis the other day  when something remarkable happened on the court.  Tiffany began telling “her” story.  Wow! It was so amazing, I wanted to share it with you!  So, I asked her to be a guest blogger for me.  So, here she is!!! Yep, I have some amazing friends!

Have you ever felt like something needs to change?

Whether it’s your attitude, routine, discipline or just life as a whole?

Have you experienced the lowest of lows when nothing seems to be going right and you’re just downright sad or the highest of highs that are exhilarating and busy yet exhausting and many times just as disappointing as the lows when you feel as though you’re in an endless cycle of spinning your wheels?

Doesn’t matter the spin cycle, slow or fast, you’re desperate for something to change.

Do you wish for a fresh start?

How about just a new beginning?

Whichever scenario resonates with you, there is certainly one thing to which we can all understand — life. is. tough.

A few years ago, that time in my life came–a need for change. I was just coming out of the hardest year of my life to date where it felt like there was no end to my misery. I say “to date” because, while I don’t wish for a year like that again, I know that the Lord used that year to establish in my heart a dependence on Him like no other. A strength in His power, not my own. A perseverance that gives me the hope and confidence I can get through another inevitable trying year through Him.

All the years before; however, I wondered why that change would never come when I was so desperate for it. It wasn’t until I realized that my desperation for change without the willpower to do so is just that–a state of mind–a mythical wishing for something to change. I have learned, though, that willpower goes hand-in-hand with change. It was when my “willingness” and “obedience” to this change collided that I opened myself up to this new beginning that I am honored to share with you all as a guest on Stephanie’s blog.

People always say, “Mom is always right” or “Mothers know best”. While we know this as truth, we resist the heck out of those sayings … for reasons unbeknownst to me. Moms rock! The adage is SO true — Mom is always right. My mom had been telling me for years (years I tell you) to join a running club or a rowing team or do this and do that — insert your mother’s “always right” moments here. I don’t know where or how she came and continually comes up with these things, but she is never ceasing to encourage me to try new things, to push myself, and to see the Lord in all his goodness and glory for His guidance and wisdom. Yet in our innate rebellious instincts as daughters, I kept resisting her advice. I mean pushing it hard out of my mind, even to the point of getting mad at her for these preposterous ideas. Because, don’t you know Mom? I like comfort. No, I LOVE comfort. My comfort zone is my safe space. How dare you tell me to get out of that zone?!

After many years of resistance, I caved. I finally decided to listen to her. I FINALLY decided to allow my rebellious, stubborn willpower to meet my need for change head-on. You’re anxious to find out what this life-changing decision was, right? Hold on to your seats, people!

Tennis.

A month long (*gasp) tennis class for beginners. You’re laughing, aren’t you? Or maybe you’re completely understanding where I was at? I hope for the latter.

You see, the reason this was so life-changing was not because I finally gave in to my mother’s continuous head-beating encouragement. No, it was because, exactly a year and four months previous, I was in- and out- of doctors’ offices and hospitals trying desperately to figure out why my 26-year-old body was FAILING me.

Over a six-month span, I was growing weaker by the day, writhing in pain, and losing my independence before my very eyes. For months, I would wake up exhausted, go to work, come home for lunch, nap, go back to work, come home, and immediately go to bed. I knew something was wrong, but doctor-after-doctor could not figure it out. As it got worse, my stays at hospitals grew longer and my fear increased that this was it. This was the end of my time here on Earth.

Who was there, though, back with that “Mama knows best” mindset? You got it. She was there day-by-day and night-by-night, praying earnestly and steadfastly, encouraging me, and enduring my need for no sound or light as I lay helpless in a hospital bed. She called on every prayer warrior she knew to believe for a miracle, if it was His will, while also praying the story of Abraham and Isaac to provide her the strength to give me up if that was His will, also.

When ALL felt lost, the multitude of prayers were finally answered. I was on the road to recovery. I spent the next three weeks of my life in an inpatient rehab facility re-learning how to function as an adult because I had basically reverted to toddlerhood during my sickness. I had to re-learn how to walk, talk, get dressed, etc. I had to regain my strength in my feeble arms and legs. It was the craziest, most humbling, hardest and longest 3 weeks of my life!

When I gained my strength back, I could see so clearly that I was given a second chance at life and I firmly believe the Lord used this in my life as part of my story for His glory. He highlighted His goodness through my sufferings. I decided I wasn’t going to let this time in my life determine the rest of my life. This was the perfect opportunity for me to make changes and look at life with a whole new perspective.

In September of 2017, exactly 1 year and 4 months after rehab, I joined that beginner tennis class. At the end of that month-long class, my teacher told me he wanted to connect me with another tennis coach who has different teams. Now, here I am, playing tennis four-to-five times a week on various teams, spending weekends at tennis tournaments and playing with new friends. Y’all, I couldn’t walk at one point, now I’m bouncing around on a tennis court?! It’s totally crazy to me, of all things, what the Lord used to bring change in my life was a sport. If I had to dress up as one of the Spice Girls, I wouldn’t have necessarily been chosen as Sporty Spice right off the bat! But, the Lord works in mysterious ways!

I have made so many new friends of all ages and backgrounds, people whose paths I don’t know I would have ever crossed had it not been for this sport. Being on the court with friends, I can escape from my own fears and worries. I get to laugh together at our crazy mishaps where it seems like there is a hole in our racquet or we take a tumble. We get to cheer each other on when we make a great shot and lift each other up when we make a mistake. We get the opportunity to be healthy and active. I’m able to enjoy the beautiful sunshine and this great Louisiana weather! It can be 75 and sunny as it is while I’m writing this blog, or 50 degrees and feeling as if our fingers are numb, or 95 degrees and we all smell like bug spray or sunscreen!

What is life throwing at you in this moment?

What can be a new beginning for you in your career, in your marriage, social life, physical life or daily routine?

Whatever season you are in, whatever that tugging is on your heart, just do it.

Take that leap of faith.

Listen to those that are encouraging you, pray through their advice if it could be something you need.

I pray that whoever is reading this finds hope that even though life might not go as you planned which is hard to accept He has a plan.

This past Sunday my pastor said one of his awesome one-liners. Those statements that just stick with you. “Nobody can stop you, except you.”

It’s scary to shake things up, but push yourself and try your “new beginning”. It could be as simple as waking up and writing 3 things you are thankful for on a daily basis, being intentional on calling or texting a friend to check in once a month, memorizing scripture, learning to cook one or two meals a week instead of picking up the phone to order that takeout, learning to play an instrument, listening to worship music or sermons on your drive into work, or taking up a sport like tennis.

Thank you, Stephanie, for letting me guest blog! This woman is such an inspiration of how you can’t let life get you down. I don’t think I have ever seen her not smiling, cracking some joke or laughing. She may be putting on a brave face at times because we all have our moments where we just can’t deal, but I do know without a shadow of a doubt, she sure does bring me joy and I believe to so many others. And for that, I’m so thankful to have met you.