Home: Where Your Heart and the People You Love Are

“…The main thing though is that they are safe. A house is something that you can repair and fix. Home truly is where your heart and the people you love are. Please keep the many families that lost everything in your thought and prayers. God will see them and everyone else through this. There is always a rainbow at the end of the storm.”  Savannah Payne, Facebook Post, August 14, 2016.

Wow. That’s my daughter, Savannah.  An eternal optimist.  Always looking on the bright side of the storm.  A “silver-lining” kind of person.  Savannah posted this to Facebook to update friends and family after our house flooded last year.  “Home truly is where your heart and the people you love are.” Profound statement by this young adult.

Profound, indeed.

Where is your home? Not where you live. Not a physical address.

Where is your “home”?

Where and with whom do you thrive?

Your sweet spot with those you love, where do you find it?  That’s where home is, where your heart and the people you love are.

Home.

I haven’t been “home” much at my house the last several months.  Consequently, I haven’t had an opportunity to blog in five weeks.  Although I have not been at my house…I have been “home”.  During these last 5 weeks, I had to cancel three speaking engagements but had the privilege of spending much time with my parents and many conversations with my brother.  Although my mother was diagnosed almost 4 years ago with Stage IV lung cancer and had exhausted conventional therapies (i.e., radiation and chemotherapy), you wouldn’t know it if you saw her.  She has responded favorably to a new therapy, immunotherapy.  She has been in a clinical trial at MD Anderson for about a year.  Well, as cancer does, it visited again.  We were made aware that a malignant tumor has showed up in her brain and MUST be removed.  August through September were spent making a rushed trip to meet the neurosurgeon at the ER; multiple visits to MD Anderson; Hurricane Harvey chasing us out of Houston; waiting for the surgery to be scheduled; finally – “It’s Surgery Day”, wait a minute, no it’s not; NOW, it’s “Surgery Day” three days later; trying to find hotel rooms in Houston; recovery, then radiation; blood clot; now, finally we are HOME.

During times like these, you can lose sight of your “home”.  You can get swept away with worry, anxiety, sadness, anger, and frustration.  We must make a choice to get “home” again.  Reclaim our “sweet spot”.  Figure out where our heart and minds are and where they need to be…and GET THERE.  It is a conscious choice to “go home” and “stay at home”.  I found myself, at times, allowing my mind to take me places it did not need to go.  What if she is unable to walk and/or move as a result of this surgery? What are we going to do if something happens to her during surgery? Should I stay or should I go? This is causing my stomach to tighten just as I am remembering how I was feeling at the time!

Then, it happened.  I “went home”.  I reminded myself that, although I think I’m in control, I’m not.  But I know quite well who IS. I thought about Savannah and how God’s grace covered her completely and expected Him to do so with my mother. I released myself of having to KNOW everything that was going on. I slowed down and stayed in the moment, appreciating every moment I had with my parents and brother.

Home.  “Home” feels good. “Home” feels right.

I made the choice to slow down, be still, and appreciate that HE IS GOD.

Home.

During a conversation with my brother, I was reminded of a scene from the movie Hitch.  I remember watching this movie with Savannah and Isabella and laughing at this particular scene. Kevin James’ character has sought out a love and dating coach, Hitch (played by Will Smith), who he hopes can help him nab someone WAY out of his social standing and league.  This scene shows him being “coached” on dating behavior and, specifically, dancing. You can watch the clip here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50YQeugOMOw.  Basically, Kevin James’ character THINKS he’s got it all together in the dancing department and has no clue he looks like an idiot. However, he quickly finds out he was way off! His coach demands he never do that again and shows him his new moves.  Hitch says to him, “This is where you live.” “This is home.” “Elbows 6 inches from the waist” and keep them at “90 degree angles.” “This is where you live.”

I reminded my brother of this scene.  We need to stay at “home” and don’t get ahead of ourselves.  “This is where we live.” Sometimes we let our minds race ahead and we leave “home”, our sweet spot.  This is where we, basically, end up looking like an idiot and making ourselves (and everyone else in our world) miserable, as well.  We allow ourselves to be consumed with worry, sadness, anxiety, anger, and frustration.  We are miserable and must find our way “home”.  We sometimes need a slap in the face, like Hitch slapped his client to get him back to reality.

All things come together when we go and stay at “home”.  Where is your heart and the people you love? Get there.  Reconnect with the Creator and how HE created you.  Have conversations with Jesus about finding your “home” and how to stay there.  He lives there. He is where your heart is.

Now, here’s the thing about “home”. It’s going to face trauma, death, hurricanes, floods, wildfires, earthquakes, terror.  It IS because we live in an imperfect world.  However, when we reconnect with our “home”, we are faced with the reality that THIS is really not our home.  Our “home” is with our Heavenly Father.  Our “home” is literally a choice away.

All feels right and good when we are at “home”.  The last scene in the movie is the dance from Kevin James’ wedding.  Yep, he got the “way out of his league” girl AND the dance moves worked once he connected with his “home”, his sweet spot.  Check out the moves at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lY1P0UTFKJI.  It all worked; it all came together for the good of all involved! Yes, it was still bumpy and a little awkward, but it worked.

So, I encourage you to go and stay at “home”.  If you don’t know your “home”, then take time to find your “home”.

As Savannah’s post said in regards to the flood that hit our home, I ask that you keep the families who lost everything in your thoughts and prayers.  We are at an unprecedented time in our country with many still reeling from floods, hurricanes, terror attacks, senseless killings, and wildfires.  We MUST keep them close to our thoughts and prayers.

Savannah mentioned a “rainbow at the end of storm”.  Many people remembered her post and sent me double rainbows while she was in the hospital.  Please enjoy this picture of rainbows overlooking our neighborhood.  This greeted me one evening as I returned from my first speaking engagement in January.

Home.

Go home and THRIVE,

Stephanie